About Me

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I am a woman learning to heal from past sexual, emotional, and physical abuse along with neglect. I have been diagnosised with DID and Complex PTSD both direct causes of the abuse. jazmineo1112@yahoo.com

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

What is wrong with me?

Why am I still so depressed?
I am so down in the dumps.
Again, fighting alters.

Sitting in class pretending I'm ok.
I hate this feeling.

I have got to get out of the past and into the present.
Currently there is nothing for me to be sad or depressed about.
My present life is going well.
So what's wrong?

Are the alters upset thinking I'm going to forget about them?
Do they think that if I am happy, the past is discounted?

I suffered abuse in the past too but it's time to live in the present.
I can't let the alters affect me anymore. I must be strong.

Fighting my urge to drink and run from my feelings.
I want to so bad.
I know I shouldn't.
I must remain strong and fight.

I'm a fighter!
I'm a survivor!
I will succeed!
I will thrive!


  1. I know how you feel. I've been severely depressed lately myself. The past few days have brought some degree of relief fortunately.

    Hang in there, things will get better.

    1. Many me,

      I am still waiting on my relief that isn't self-injurious from an alter. This is tough.

      I'm so hoping things will get better. I've had ups and downs each day.